17 September 2007

yoga yoga everywhere, but no experience will speak

For the last several months, I've surfed all sorts of yoga sites and blogs. It's interesting that almost no one writes about their individual experiences practicing yoga. Most duplicate information that was written by spiritual masters, or writing about how they are an incredible a teacher, or how they are conscious or "enlightened."


Commitment to Daily Yoga Practice:
It is now Day 16 of practicing nabhi kriya. (Follow this link for Postures in Kriya)

Today, I successfully completed full times given for each posture. (up to now, I was doing half time). I could move through each posture with integrity, and maintain perfect form. The second exercise did challenge me again for the last 2 minutes. I just slowed down so that I wouldn't tense up on the posture. (no clenching jaw or shoulders.)

I've practiced countless kundalini yoga kriyas over the years (for 40 days and more). I've practiced meditations, several for mastery. (every day for 1000 days, and more). Yet, I've always avoided practicing nabhi kriya. The few times that I've started it, I found that I couldn't control my emotions and I was spit-fire angry at everyone.

What are my Experiences now?
Below are seven observations that I have made over the last week. After I reviewed my observations, I realized that seven is the number of perfection, security, safety and rest.

1) From Annoyed to Amused: After the five days of complete physical release, I moved into a "slightly off" space. Emotionally, I have gotten annoyed at environments, but not angry. My annoyance passed quickly, and I had to laugh at myself. A few times, my monkey mind went out of control but I found my center just by pausing and using these techniques. (see yesterday's post)

2) Neutral Mind: Overall, I'm less opinionated when engaged in emotionally charged topics. My thoughts are in balance and more centered than ever. I'm not out to prove a point, or defend my situation. It just doesn't seem as important. I listen.

3) Improved Posture: Physically, my spine feels aligned. I stand taller...than I already am. My left hip, that has always been problematic, feels adjusted. When I sit in lotus pose, my left knee doesn't pop up...it's flattening closer to the floor.

4) No Expectation, Not Processing: I'm not sure if my experiences these days are because I have given up expectations of outcome, stopped worrying about "processing," or whether I've matured.
I remember the many times I've been blasted with anger from a fellow yoga practitioner, only to have him or her come back a few minutes later, and say "Sorry, I'm just processing." It was always so harsh and confusing to me. Being on the receiving end of "processing" has turned me off to refer to my experience as processing. So rather than processing, I've moved through having expectations of an outcome from this daily practice.

5) Listen to My Inner Voice:  I've stopped listening to the memory tapes of my friends saying things like: "nabhi kriya makes you really angry" or "it hurts too much to practice" or "waaayyyy too intense of a yoga set, no way" or "i don't have that much time to practice a whole set."

6) From There to Here: After traveling to the dark side of pain and anguish over this last year, I can say that I'm back on track. My intension to live...rather than die...is solid. Every moment is fresh. I'm not even half way through the 40 days. Each day, I anticipate the hour that I've set aside for this kriya for whatever it will bring. When I wake up in the morning to the symphony of honking horns and yelling voices in the street, I smile.

7) It's a new day.

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Mind can be a good friend if handled with care, but it can be a great enemy if untrained and undisciplined. - Paramahamsa Hariharananda 
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