11 September 2007

the body speaks

Day 10 of nabhi kriya. Core becoming stronger...physical condition somewhat stable. Just as I did when I decided to start this intended yoga set, I flipped back the pages of my journal to read my free-flow moments from the past few days. (yes, despite being flat on my back in bed...I am true to my daily "time to write.")

I can only liken my condition to heat stroke. I write this because the trigger to all of this dis-harmony in my body seemed to be kicked into high gear by spending the entire day outside last Thursday. I was exercising and only drank less than a liter of water.

Indeed, the lack of water and the Cairo heat contributed somewhat to my physical problems over the last 5 days. But, I also know that issues run deep and will find a way to surface by our unconscious acts.

My reference guide whenever I experience serious physical ailments is "the Body Speaks" by Michael J. Lincoln (aka Dr. Narayan Singh) His website is a wealth of information: Talking Hearts

I've copied the below physical conditions for reference, unedited and straight from his book. I hope that anyone reading this post might find this information insightful and helpful. As I usually find for any of Mr. Lincoln's deeply intuitive prescriptions, some points strike a nerve, some not...but I rarely discount much of this man's insights.

HEAT-STROKE (Dizziness, nausea, spots before their eyes)
“Get me outta here!” They are feeling overwhelmed and very oppressed by their current circumstances.
They are highly co-dependent and over-responsible for everyone in their life’s problems, and they hate it.
They are disgusted and revolted, and their feeling is that “This is an up with which I will no long put!”
It came from out of nowhere in a “return of the repressed” fashion as their situation reactivated their childhood experiences in spades.
They were systematically suppressed, exploited and blamed by their dysfunctional family.

“What a revolting development THIS is!” They are having a fear and disgust reac-tion to what is happening to them.
They are totally rejecting an idea or experience -- they don’t want to have anything to do with it.
They want to throw it right back out again.
They feel that something wrong or immoral is happening.
They are inundated with disgust with the situation and themselves, and they are full of fear of the consequences of what’s going down.
They feel that something dreadful has happened, and they feel responsible for it. They wish it hadn’t happened, and they are truly sorry it has occurred.
They deeply wish they hadn’t “done it”.
They want things to return to the way they were before this hap-pened.
They are full of upset, pain and sadness, they don’t want the situation anywhere near them.
They desperately want to undo the past, and they are afraid of the effects of this on their future.
They are full of dissatisfaction, disgust and regret over the way things are.
They are saying to themselves over and over, “I should have . . .”
They feel personally accountable for everything that happens, particularly the negative outcomes.
Their family held them accountable and responsible for all that took place, and all eyes turned in their direction when anything went wrong -- which was frequently.
They were made very aware they had no right to commit to anyone or anything else but the continued maintenance of the family.
They therefore have great guilt about sexuality, success, and intimacy, as if these were “evil deeds”.

“Shooting the rapids.” They are feeling overwhelmed, that things are moving too fast.
They are intensely rejecting of the possibilities in front of them.
They are fearful, and they want to run off, to get away from all this.
They don’t want to assimilate and absorb what they are experiencing.
They feel in over their head much of the time, and they are easily flattened by ex-periences.
They are the product of over-protective and possessive parenting in which they were systematically programmed to be unable to cope with life’s demands.
“Get out of my life!”. They need to get rid of some duty, some obligation or some other thing in their life.
They are desparately trying to clear the toxic systems, situations and people out of their life.
They want to get this over with so as to return to a desired routine.
They are in effect seeking to escape the situation and running away from the re-requirements involved.
They tend to be compulsively orderly and sameness-demanding in their function-ing.
However, they are wanting to “throw the baby out with the bath” as they reject the past, and they try to get rid of ideas too rapidly.
They are wanting to get the whole thing over with in a hurry, and they are rushing it.
There is an underlying passivity and desire not to be bothered, and they are acutely fearful of their situation.
They are the product of a competence- and confidence-undermining enmeshed dys-functional family.
“Here it comes!”. They are faced with a heavy and meaningful task, they wish it were over and done with.
Something important is pending, and they don’t want to go through with it.
They have a fair amount of competence-anxiety and built-in programming against success and intimacy.
They were supposed to stick around the old homestead and take care of their par-ents.
Any move towards independence, self-empowerment, and significant involvement/ contribution/commitment activates annihilation-anxiety and betrayal-guilt.
The current situation is just such a requirement and issue for them.

The “TROTS”; The “RUNS”
“Scared shitless”. They are being overwhelmed by the requirement and/or process of having either to let go of the past or to take on something radially new and different. Something extremely important is pending and about to happen, and they are totally terrified of its implications and ramifications.
They are wanting to rush through it with their nose plugged, so to speak, so as to not experience it or the transition process to it.
The situation at hand is one in which they are being forced out of their old pattern of lifestyle, and they are completely blown away by the prospects of life without it.
They come from a chronically anxious and catastrophe-expecting “hunkering down in the bunker” family culture.
“Hands on control”. There is an underlying passivity and desire not to be bothered, and yet they are simply terrified of letting go.
They have an abiding fear of the Universe, and they have to have personal control of their life and of the environment around them. http://www.blogger.com/img/gl.link.gif
It feels like a matter of almost life and death to them.
They grew up alone on their own in totally untrustworthy but seemingly unim-peachable environment, but their deeper experience was that things are never as they seem.
They learned to take care of everything and everyone, in a desparate disaster-de-flecting psychology.
The “buck stopped with them”, while the family considered them to be the cause of all their problems.

** Read more "Messages from the Body," by Michael J. Lincoln available on line at Talking Hearts


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